Life.

Decision making frankly sucks. I hate having to chose one thing over the other. Can't I just have it all? Does that mean I'm greedy? I don't know. Maybe it means I can't make a choice. That I'm unable to say something is white when it's white, and not claim that it's gray. Usually I do make choices about petty, unimportant questions. Such as, what to wear, what to eat. that sorta thing. But the life altering, life impacting questions are what I dread the most. If it was up to me, I'd chose one thing and go with the flow. The problem arises when I take into the interests and concerns of others. That is what leads me to doubly question everything. It's just so, difficult. I wish God could just tell me what decision to make and reassure me that I'm right. If that was the case, there would be no failures, no losers, no hatred, no nothing. Life, I suppose, would be utterly boring. Also, people would give up the second-time around and just do, nothing. Apathetic world views would emerge. OK, maybe I'm thinking about this way too much. But it's my future! I have time to make this decision that is on my mind, but have so much to think about and actually do.

This sucks.

God, help.